Adieu Dear Mother

The only certain event in life is death. Rather a blunt and crude interpretation of existence – Isn’t. That which is born has got to go as and when the beckoning call comes from HIM.

My dear mother Smt. Thailambal was summoned to her heavenly abode in the wee hours of Sunday, the 31^st January 2016 after prolonged illness. The subpoena got served a little late but it is not subject to our whims, but solely rests on the dispatching authority perched in His headquarters up above the sky.

She lived a full, calm and contented life. She personified a traditional, devoted housewife and encompassed in herself all those noble qualities that go to eulogize motherhood.

Born as a darling child in a liberal Tamil Brahmin family, bereft of rigid orthodoxy, she got wedded into a contrasting family, where rituals and customs held ( still hold sway with shades of dilution having crept with passage of time ) and influx of modernity and its paraphernalia.

Amma was an embodiment of patience, reservoir of affection and accommodation, personification of kindness, devotion and dedication. She steered our family in a perfect, gentle manner with a suave nature and conduct. We have never seen her in an angry, morose mood nor heard her speak in raised decibels as they were not only anathema but also alien to her. She  never  sounded  a  different  opinion  or  raised  a  discordant note  ( rather not had / given the choice too )  on any matter with my father, what with the stringent environment that prevailed during yesteryears.  But she took everything with a smile, never felt hurt even for a while, but went an extra mile to keep all of us in perfect shape and style.

She was a great host – can be called an Annapoorani or Annalakshmi. She served food to hundreds in our house – ( transcending barriers,  treating  relatives, friends, well wishers et al ) alike, sweating it out in the old, smoky kitchen, without any trace of hesitation, irritation or exhibiting signs of tiredness.

Amma remained a pillar of strength and support to myself and siblings. As for my father it can be said that she stood by him like the rock of Gibraltar, in facing the vicissitudes and vagaries of life.  Indeed Thailambal belongs to the league of extraordinary women, despite having led an ordinary life. I bow before you ma.

You were never a cause of trouble to anyone but remained a token of strength all through.  Despite ill health plaguing, you traversed as long as you could with determination, and bore all bodily ills, pains with grit and resolve until the last breath.

Amma, I am sure your soul will rest in peace in heaven ( as that’s your rightful, eternal abode ) under the Almighty’s tender care and protective embrace.

You are gone now, and can never be seen again. That’s the harsh fact imposed by nature on all living beings, more to be felt and grieved by mortals. You will always be remembered and live forever in our hearts.  

Though I managed to remain composed while performing her last rites, tears welled up when the funeral pyre was lit.  Kavignar Kannadasan’s lyric in the all time favourite song "Ponal Pogattum Poda" - "போனால் போகட்டும் போடா", which poignantly narrates the travesty of human existence from birth to death  came to my mind,  that  goes as

“Elumbukkum Sadhaikkum Maruththuvam Kanden

Idharkoru Marundhai Kandena?

Irundhal Avalai Thannanthaniye

Eriyum Neruppil Viduvena?"

"எலும்புக்கும் சதைக்கும் மருத்துவம் கண்டேன்

இதற்கொரு மருந்தைக் கண்டேனா?

இருந்தால் அவளைத் தன்னந்தனியே

எரியும் நெருப்பில் விடுவேனா?"

Meaning  - I have found medicines to cure ailments affecting the bones and skin, but couldn’t find a medicine to prevent death.  If I had achieved it,  how could I  ever leave you burning all alone in the funeral pyre ?

And the following hymn of Pattinathar also echoed in my ears -

"Munnai Itta Thee Muppuraththile

Pinnai Itta Thee Then Ilangaiyile

Annai Itta Thee Adi Vayitrile

Yanum Itta Thee Mulga Mulgave"

"முன்னையிட்ட தீ முப்புறத்திலே

பின்னையிட்ட தீ தென் இலங்கையிலே

அன்னையிட்ட தீ அடிவயிற்றிலே

யானுமிட்ட தீ மூள்க மூள்கவே"

Meaning – The fire which emanated in the front from Lord Shiva’s Third Eye charred the Thirupura Asura Country, The fire that was lit in the back of Hanuman’s tail burnt Lanka,  The Fire that the mother holds is in the womb, and let the fire lit by me grow and grow so as to char my mother’s mortal remains.

Love you and Good Bye Dear Amma - Rest in Peace

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